Saturday, October 9, 2010

Sign of....

Being MOM:

The events of last night's bath time were not really worth mentioning....in fact, I even forgot about everything that occurred until bath time tonight! But after further reflection, I realized it was pretty doggone hilarious. So...for the queasy stomach/faint of heart - don't read this. But if you can handle some "potty humor" hang around.

Bitty Bean. God bless Bitty Bean. Bless her little heart. 

I started the water in the tub - and pulled the diaper off Bitty Bean. I checked the temp on the water....turned back around to check the munchkin...and stepped in a pool of nice, warm, pee. Yep. She loves me. She did it on the easy-to-clean-doesn't-make-laundry FLOOR. No rug! Woohoo!!

Yes - I am excited about pee on the floor. But you have to take it in context. 

Then - yes, there's more. Oh so much more! - I set Bitty Bean in the tub and proceeded to strip Jumping Bean. I was sitting in the bathroom - just had my back to a singing Bitty Bean for a moment while I unbuttoned her shirt! When I turned back around to put Jumping Bean in the tub - there were floaters. LOTS and LOTS of floaters. (That's poop for any of you who don't know) Poor little Bean had the runs. ..and she's gonna kill me when she's older because this is on the internet. Oh well. There was poop all up in that tub. In the toys. In the water. In her hand. Yes. IN HER HAND. I grabbed her and pulled her out of the tub - after getting her to release her grip on the one mostly-solid-piece-she-had-a-death-hold-on  - and proceeded to drain the tub. AND rinse all the toys.

Which, by the way, are all in the dishwasher currently getting sterilized. Have I mentioned how very much I love my dishwasher? It could count as an affair.  

Now the tub has been scrubbed ahead of schedule! Between the surprise mopping of the laundry room and the extra tub scrub...I'd say my week is keeping my house nice and clean. 

Does this story sound familiar? Please tell me I am not the only person who has had to deal with this. Obviously, I've dealt with it numerous times...otherwise it would have been a little more noteworthy. In fact, in December of 2008 I posted all about a very similar experience with Jumping Bean...

******
There are certain sentences that every mother knows and fears. Today I had the distinct privilege of experiencing one of them being yelled at me -
"Mom!!! Jumping Bean Pooped in the Tub!"
Definitely not one of my favorite things to hear. 

My least favorite is "Shhhh - don't cry!" Which is typically immediately followed by hysterical screaming.

Anyway, I was watching the beans play during their bath tonight and noticed Jumping Bean doing a bit of pushing. (Stop reading now if you don't like waaaay too much information.) I assumed it was gas since we'd already taken care of business today. Shortly after her momentary exertion, String Bean yelled that disgusting sentence mentioned earlier. 

Of course since Jumping Bean is a thoughtful child, she was at least considerate enough to poop in the mouth of fishy bath toy which managed to catch the majority of her "present." 

She is REALLY gonna hate me when she's older; and yes, the fishy has floated on to other things.

However, there naturally was a rogue floater. Jumping Bean (with her cat-like reflexes) dove for the lone piece, snatched it in her hand, and headed straight for her mouth. Thankfully my super-mom reflexes are a touch faster than a cat's, so I was able to redirect the piece from its intended goal of reentry - strait to the toilet. 

After NUMEROUS hand-washings and a draining and subsequent refilling of the tub, the bath was able to resume.

Once again I was struck by a clear picture of what motherhood is all about - 

Crap happens. But that doesn't mean you have to sit in it freaking out and whining. You can take action - do something about it. Try again. Start from scratch. It may happen again - but then again, it just might not. 

AND eventually, it will probably be a funny story!

Copyright 2010

3 comments:

  1. Ha! One of my coworkers has given Michael and me our marriage motto: "Working through crap...together." Sounds like it'll be a Mommy-motto when the time comes, too :)

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  2. oh yes... the twins did this once during bath time and I was so grossed out that I started gagging and John had to do the honors of cleaning what I called "the sewage tank" haha - poor guy. Then he turned the shower on them to clean the poo off and they were totally traumatized! I will NEVER forget that evening!

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  3. i happened to be in the tub with the offending child and floaters. i never took a bath again with a baby!

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Thank you for your thoughts and encouragement!