Bring it on...

Recently, I thought I would have another sad-sappy-story-day without much funny in it because of how it started:

String Bean walked in to my bathroom when she first woke up...saw me showered and in my towel....and burst into tears.

While I have felt that way looking at my ever-expanding-girth-in-a-towel-that-is-constantly-getting-too-small; I thought her reaction a tad extreme. On the side - by the end of my pregnancies....I use a beach towel in the bathroom. 'Cause I'm cool like that.

Anyway. Back to the tears...

So, she burst into tears and I assumed it wasn't because she saw me. So I got down on her level and asked her if she wanted to cuddle and sit in my lap. (Typically what she wants to do if she is sad.) She nodded and waited patiently as I was situated in the chair. When she was comfortably settled in my lap, she looked at me with tear-filled eyes and said, "I miss Daddy." Then she couldn't go on because she started to cry.

I seriously contemplated keeping her home from school. She was so forlorn and overwhelmed by missing her Daddy...but first I asked if she wanted to email Daddy to help him feel closer. (She dictates emails and I type EXACTLY what she says.)  So off we plodded to the computer area...and she proceeded to start her letter like this...

Hi there Daddy.
This is me Canaan. We know that you miss us and we miss you too.

I thought it would stay in that vein for a while. I was wrong. The very next sentence was this:

Mom's gonna put beans on our wreath, and if it looks pretty she's gonna put ribbon on the wreath for our WHOLE life for every single season of the year.

More on that another day. But apparently, every aspect of my decorating is noteworthy enough to tell Daddy. The fact that I am decorating...with beans...and ribbon...and want to use something for a while.  

I like to keep people on their toes. I'm crafty like that. . . in a daughter-of-Eve-sort-of-way. 

 She ended up going to school and I thought all was well.

It wasn't.

Without my knowledge, Jumping Bean and Bitty Bean had been preparing for battle. Against their mother. They had youth, stamina, and wills of steel ready in their arsenal. I did not. I was tired, hungry, and Boy Bean was using my rib cage for boxing practice.  It was a VERY LONG DAY.

After we picked String Bean back up from school...and played in the pouring down rain for two hours...we'd been cooped up inside for a week!...it was bath time.

I'll be honest.

By this time, my patience had left the building; my sanity was seeking to follow suit; my legs were taking turns being numb; I was very hungry; and "good mommy" was nowhere to be found. 

String Bean needed to stand up for something in the bathtub - and wouldn't. Despite being instructed by the woman-with-blood-shot-eyes-and-tight-voice, she would not move. Calmly (REALLY!!) I told her, "You will be disciplined after bath for not obeying."  She slowly raised her head...set her jaw...and then opened the door to a new phase:
"I'm gonna leave this house forever if that happens."

Yep. She went there. I, however, did not. I continued washing the children, leveled my eyes at her and said "What ON EARTH would you do on your own? You are FIVE! Where would you eat? Where would you sleep? How would you get anywhere? Where would you get money for food, clothes, bills?! No. You are not going anywhere."

She sat there in stunned in silence...looked around the tub, and said, "That didn't really go like I thought it would."

Mommy - 1
Beans - 0

And all is well in the world.

Copyright 2010