Little sweet things....

As I was scrubbing the bathroom today...this nesting thing is definitely making my house spic and span!...I looked at my "Jewelry organizer" on our bathroom sink. This metal piece has a bit of history to it...

For our 2nd anniversary, My Love was extremely creative. (He had to be since we had a 6 week old!) He had returned from sea just before String Bean was born and wanted to celebrate this milestone in a special way.

So, he kicked me out of the house.

For just the afternoon.

(Please forgive the crumbs and water stains...I forgot to take a "before" picture!)

And when I returned, our front porch had been transformed into a beautifully romantic dinner setting for two. He had coordinated with two of his friends - who just happened to be AMAZING chefs - and we had one of our best dates ever. He had found flowers similar to the ones in my bouquet to place on the table...he found a purple runner like what was used at our reception...and he placed a beautiful metal candle centerpiece in the middle of the table to top it all off.  

It was perfect.

I'm sorry to say for a couple years that centerpiece was sitting in a box buried away...we didn't have a table big enough for a centerpiece...I didn't know what to do with it...and it just felt a little too fancy for every day.

But one day as I was trying to figure out a way to keep my jewelry organized and not in a knotted mess in a bag...I remembered this piece. I hunted around. Dug it out. And realized - just because it was MADE to be a table centerpiece or candle holder...it didn't have to stay that way!

So now, every day when I pick a necklace or put on ear rings...I get to remember this act of love and attention he showed to me. 

 And I smile. And remember exactly what it is I love about this man...All the little moments that make a life wonderful.

(If you like any of the flower hair clips - you MUST check out Poppie Lane!)

Copyright 2010

No time to paint....

"Love doesn't keep a record of wrongs...it lets go...it moves on - 
Oh and time moves by too fast - to keep painting pictures of the past."
Warren Barfield: Pictures of the Past

As I've been reminiscing over the past 7 years as a wife...I've realized the importance of not keeping a record of wrongs.  The verse from 1 Cor. 13 was read at our wedding...but I had no idea the impact it would have on our marriage and relationship.

It is so very easy to get caught up in tallying what I've done vs. what he's done....and then determining who's gonna pay up. It doesn't have to be a record of horrible deep wounds - although that shouldn't happen either! - it could just be a record of careless words, thoughtless moments, laziness, forgetfulness....simple things like the dirty laundry always ending up on the floor NEXT to the hamper - never making the bed - not cleaning out the car.

A tally of how many hours of sleep we each got in the week to determine who wins the treat of waking up slowly on Saturday morning. 

It could be things that don't seem like a record...yet I want him to pay up to balance it out. 

Keeping track of whatever he's done...or not done...or should do...or could do....and then lording it over him.

Not exactly the recipe for a happy, healthy, loving, marriage - or relationship.

Yet, I find I have to constantly combat this thought process in all my relationships. Love isn't about how much they give me - it is a free gift I have given them.

I am not advocating that horrible behavior be allowed in the name of love, please don't misunderstand me. 

Love doesn't keep a record of wrongs....what an amazing concept. It beautifully illustrates what Christ did for us - and it challenges me to be a better model for my children, my family, and my friends.

To be completely honest - there have been times I had to leave my Bible open to these verses...and out on the counter or the table...and make myself go back and re-read them every time the replay of the offense came up. Some days that would mean only once...other days...other hurts...it would be countless times for weeks. Or months.

But, eventually, that record would no longer be kept. It would stop replaying in my mind. I could see the positive in that person...or situation...or whatever it was.  It wasn't easy. It wasn't fun. But it was worth every single moment of forcing myself to see the good and not just the hurt. To see the person as just one other human being Christ died for - and not as just the cause of my pain.

The constant battle against reliving past hurts...past wrongs....is very, very hard. But in the end - replaying the hurt is mainly just hurting yourself. Over and over again. And that is no cake walk either.

Time is just zipping by...better put that "past" paintbrush away...and treasure the moments I have in front of me.

Copyright 2010

7 year itch...

7 years ago on this day I was counting the moments until I could say "I do" to the man oh-so-much-better-than-my-dreams. I couldn't wait to start my life with him. Stand by his side. Go on adventures. For richer, for poorer, in sickness and health.

I had absolutely NO IDEA what I was signing on for. 

Apparently the "7 year itch" phrase comes from the idea that many people want out at this point. 

I don't. 

How could I possibly have known the way my life would never be the same when I became his Mrs.? That adventure doesn't always come in amazing trips (although we have had those), fantastic excursions, or exploring of worlds unknown?

Adventure can come in the form of a move, a baby (or 4!), a broken-down car, a perceived burglar, a missed flight, pneumonia, morning sickness, parenthood, friendship...LIFE.

How could I know this man whom I yearned to be with every moment of every day would be more than my Knight in Shining Armor....he would become my best friend. He would encourage me and challenge me. He would love me always and seek to protect me.

How could I know in that moment how closely deep, heart-rending pain and fierce, passionate love are connected? 

Did he know those things?

Did he know all the levels of commitment we were agreeing to?

Love. 

Honor. 

Respect. 

Submit. 

For Always. 

Until Death.

Sounds so much easier when all you see are the Mr. Wonderful and Mrs. Amazing in front of you. But in real life....it is hard. Marriage is work. But worth every second.

If the vows read were more real....more actual life....would we still agree to them?

I promise to Love you - to wash your dirty clothes, to make the bed, to cook the food, to wipe snotty noses, to care for our home while you are far away, to listen to what you have to say...if I feel like it or not. His version: to hold your hair back during morning sickness, to rub your feet when you can't see them anymore, to provide for you, to move the furniture...again, to pay attention to paint swatches, to listen to what you have to say...whether I feel like it or not.

I promise to Honor you - to take care to not "let myself go" and take the time to be presentable; to say kind things about you - and TO you, to not talk behind your back, to speak well of you to our children, our friends, our acquaintances...no matter what. His version: to take care to not "let myself go" and take the time to be presentable; to keep my eyes for only you - no matter the distance; to say kind things about you - and TO you, to not talk behind your back, to speak well of you to our children, our friends, our acquaintances...no matter what.

I promise to Respect you - to value you opinion, to seek your advice, to heed what you say, to back you up in front of others...and behind closed doors...even if I don't understand. His version: to value your opinion, to not speak in a snide manner, to not belittle you...even if it would be easy to do so.

I promise to stay with you Always - to move wherever, whenever, every time; to choose you - over career, over children, over other family or friends...regardless of financial security, because you are the one for me. For Always.

At our wedding two pieces of literature were recited - 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails.

And William Shakespeare's Sonnet 116 - 

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove:
O no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests and is never shaken;
It is the star to every wandering bark,
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come:
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out even to the edge of doom.
   If this be error and upon me proved,
   I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

Would I agree to those conditions now??  

Yes. Because every single time - I would choose My Love again. 

He's gonna love this picture.

This road has not been smooth...or easy...but it has been ours. 

And there is noone else for me to adventure with.

Probably gonna have to post another one reminiscing this week...this is too long already!

Copyright 2010