Before I get into all of those posts I've been writing in my head for the last week - because, seriously, who uses a note pad anymore??? - I have to talk about what I just encountered yesterday.
Be warned. I will be crying as I write this.
Thursday night I got THE call from my sister...my sister who lives 40 minutes away....my sister who is 2 years younger than me....my sister whom I love deeply, don't always understand, and have experienced so much life with...my sister who was due with her first child - a baby boy - on December 26th...my sister who gave me the amazing honor of asking me to be a part of her labor/delivery/birth experience. That sister. She called because it was time.
Time for Baby R to have his birthday.
Time for a family to grow.
Time for 3 lives to be forever entwined. And changed.
She labored and delivered her son with her husband by her side. Calmly. Beautifully. It was one of the most amazing things I've ever been a part of.
I was able to watch her suddenly assume the role of Mama...and her husband become Daddy. To see their lives change - their hearts explode - their nights of sleep disappear.
I thought back to each of my moments of meeting my beans...and I was overwhelmed with the power in that moment...
That moment is the death and birth of life. Life as you knew it before is gone...changed forever. It is beautiful and amazing and petrifying and scary. The changes you know are coming are frightening enough.... but the changes you aren't aware of are more so. The sleepless nights, the decisions that only you - the parents - can make, the knowledge you could permanently screw up this person...are all very daunting.
Yet in that moment of first meeting your child - you know. You know it doesn't matter what they do - you will always love them. Your heart will ache with them when they hurt. You will cheer them the loudest throughout their life - because that is who you are. It is in your title.
So, to my sister and her husband all I have to say is this:
Congratulations on joining the club - enjoy your titles for the rest of your lives.
Be prepared to hurt like you didn't think possible,
to love more than you can fathom,
and to give beyond your limits.
You are now "Mom and Dad" and life as you know it has forever changed.