You think your job is crappy?
It is unfortunate for my children that I have a blog.
Because, when we have experiences like we did this week, I put them on the world wide web.
No longer do embarrassing stories stay relegated to the baby book or the birthday dinner.
Now they are easily accessed by anyone in the world.
At any time.
Payback is sweet.
She has pooped. Just not on the throne.
(Which is odd because she has not had a problem with it for over 6 months, and I totally call it a throne and let them be Queens when they use toilet.)
In fact, on Thursday when she called my name from upstairs and I went to see what she needed and I looked up and saw naked business covered in poop, I might have popped a blood vessel. But when I went in the bathroom and accidentally placed my bare foot in still-warm-poo on the just-mopped floor...quickly lifted up my foot...lost my balance....and planted my foot in another piece on the freshly-washed rug....something snapped.
I told that little Poop Power Plant to stay right where she was. Then, I went into my own bathroom and muttered many unwritable things under my breath.
Eventually, I was able to clean her, the floor, the rug, and the toilet up.
But Saturday would have convinced anyone that the work site had been under construction for a while, because, he loaded 9 - NINE - poop diapers.
I apologize to the neighborhood for how much my trash bins stink.
This time, I didn't get angry.
I sat down and cried.
Real tears streamed down my face...my nose was already running from the smell.
Quietly I took her and the Boy to my bathroom to clean her up and bathe them both.
And that is when I discovered Bitty Bean's current poop in her panties....was her 2nd of the day. I knew that because, dear people, there was poop clearly smeared on the front of my toilet...on the toilet seat...and a slight smattering on the floor. As I wiped the tears and squared my shoulders for the next cleaning job...
And then, I laughed. And showed her how to use a Lysol Wipe.
At least my bathrooms are getting clean!