Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Losing my mind...again

     While standing in the card section of the Navy Exchange yesterday, I had a bit of a breakdown. I was looking through the Father's day cards (Coming up THIS Sunday) and just started crying. Standing there in the aisle looking at the cards I couldn't see straight because I was crying so hard about "You are the love of my life - I knew you'd be a great Dad" and "When we started on this journey, I had no idea how much more deeply I could love you" and "Dad, if you were a booger, I'd pick you." Seriously!? I was standing there overwhelmed with love for my husband - and excessive hormones coursing through my body - and just had to sob. Loudly. Unfortunately, I was not alone in the aisle. There was an elderly couple to my right inspecting birthday cards... and I think this slightly unhinged woman unnerved them. (Considering it was in a military store - who knows why I was crying!? My husband could be deployed or could have passed away, and that would be the cause for my waterworks.) So this kind elderly woman leans over to her husband and attempts to whisper...unsuccessfully..."We need to get out of here - that woman is LOSING IT!" Before they could shuffle away, I turned to them and said apologetically "I'm sorry for crying. I'm pregnant." They both looked at me sympathetically, shared a knowing a smile, and then returned to their cards. 
      Somehow, that moment of meltdown was totally okay - all because I'm pregnant!  I am even trying my hardest to keep it together and not be a basket case (My 3 girls really do need a stable mommy!)  but without fail... I cry everyday. At least twice.  It is insane!  I watched a re-run of Glee last night and cried through the song from Les Miserables "I Dreamed a Dream." (Of course, if you don't cry during that song, I don't think you have a soul.)  For the record, my husband didn't cry. Apparently, he is like Chuck Norris.  His tears could cure cancer - but he's never cried.   I'm chalking up Jonathan's lack of emotion to not knowing the heartbreaking story of Fantine and Jean ValJean and Cosette.
   Anyway, it looks like today will be a good day...I've been awake for 2 hours and haven't cried yet!
Copyright 2010


  1. OK, gonna work on a cure for that,
    'cause when I'm in the card aisle, I'm usually
    doubled over in laughter, and my tears are from
    the laughter. And people also stare at me!!!
    Where is their sense of humor??!!
    But don't watch movies like "Beaches" or anything like that for awhile.......don't think you could handle it....Call next time a spell comes upon you and I'll share some end of the year moments that ............ well on second thought, they make me cry, so don't call!!!! 2 more days then I'm a free woman. Love you.

  2. Whit.. I just dicovered your blog, you have had for how long? I know! I know! I am always oblivious! I think this is what keeps me healthy. "Don't cry, it doesnt' change anything!"
    That is what my dad used to say!what does he know? Well, he thought it would attempt to help his over emotional daughter. I get it,,, been there in the moment. I cry too and I am trying to train myself not to cry. I cry on commercials, movies, graduations, weddings, watching my children do something really well, when my husband finishes races and he's killed himeself(don't tell him!), when I do really well at something... it's life and a happy and crying life it is. if you want to cry, cry. who cares who's watching let it flow, smile b/c you have one friend behind your back in tears! I would rather be so full of emotion than be life less with nothing to show. as for the lady, no telling where she has come from... and if you want to know something... I wanted to cry the other day when I was out... this young woman approach matt and i and sarcastically thanked us for her dinner b/c we had drama moments at our table. the nerve. the thought. she clearly doesn't have children and I for one thinks she probably never cries about how heartless she really is... sad fat puppy... alright alright enough of me and ungrateful thoughts. just know I think you are pretty cool crying and for always being you. thanks for making me smile Whit!


Thank you for your thoughts and encouragement!