Feel free to adjust the number/ages of children to apply to your life.
Actually, you have my permission to always take what I say with a piece of chocolate cake.
On to this oh-so-not-important list.....
| Sling courtesy of The Industrial Cottage |
2. Dress your kids cute. Again, utilize the distraction factor. If your kids look cute, people will be soo enamored with their utter adorableness...which, in my case, typically involves tutus, tiaras, pig tails, and necklaces.....they won't notice the fact that I haven't slept in about 5 years. And that brings me to item #3...
3. Use under eye concealer and an eyelash curler. My two good friends. Especially since random strangers like to comment on how exhausted I look. The concealer is a miracle worker in hiding the bags under my eyes...and the eyelash curler allows my eyes to appear fully open.....even when they are half-closed.
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| THIS is what happens when a 5 year old is your photographer.... |
| AND THIS is what happens when it is a 3 year old. |
Hey! Don't look down on me....my days are spent sustaining human life...what did YOU do today???
5. Wear something cute and unexpected. I normally try for a fun hair thing....a scarf...a necklace....or earrings. But some days the only thing cute I'm wearing is my baby (see #1); and the only thing unexpected is the snot-spit-up-puke-poop-pee somewhere on my body or clothes. Which brings me to item #6.....6. Shower - or at least splash water on your face - every day. Trust me. It doesn't matter that you take a military-esque shower....it will make you feel better. It also doesn't matter if you are showering purely to remove your "unexpected" accessory from your hair-face-body....just do it. And it helps you peel your eyelids up after not sleeping for months on end.
7. Smile. Because no matter how exhausted-dirty-flabby you are (Or feel!), this phase is just that - a phase. It will pass. And once it's over you will look back and remember the insanity of these moments fondly. You will look at mamas in this phase with nostalgia and a psychotic pull to return there...until you realize you have actually slept through the night more than once in the past year. Without medication.
You will smile an encouraging smile...then hand them a wet wipe to remove the snot from their shoulder.




