School...one month in

So, we've been at this "school" thing for a month now...and I have already learned a couple things.

Maybe you want to know them.
Maybe not.
But I thought I'd write them down just the same.

****I do NOT have an issue with people who choose to homeschool. This is not an attack against anyone. The following thoughts are purely my reflections on our public/Christian school experience thus far.****

For those who don't know, I live in Mayberry. Really. My neighborhood is like stepping back in time to when life was simpler. My girls (7, 5, and 3) are allowed to ride their bikes around the block without supervision. Our neighbors are lovely. We all look out for each other - we return errant children; help take each other's trash out; pick up packages if someone is out of town.

It is idyllic.

I've heard there may be a bit of Wisteria Lane thrown in to keep things interesting, but I've not experienced it!

Homeschooling last year kept me from getting to know my neighbors. It kept the beans from building relationships with friends on the block. 

Instead of investing in our community right next door, 

I was driving all over the place to build community.

Already in this month, through twice daily bus stop encounters, we have gotten to know our neighbors better than we had in the two and a half years we've lived here. 
Why the distance before? 
Partially, because I just didn't have time for this community - the one actually right outside my doorstep - I was too busy with all my other things and places and people. When we were home, I was homeschooling. Which meant, for me, I couldn't be out building friendships like I wanted - because I had too many other jobs to do. 

My children were around others a'plenty last year - socialization was never a concern. However, being in classes with children who don't live in their house, has been a very good thing. They are learning about how other people do things. They are learning how to stand up for themselves - and others. They are not surrounded by only people from church.

Which is good. (For us)

String Bean and Jumping Bean pray each night they are living in a way that shows they are "God's girls." We've been able to talk about the Fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23 "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.") and what it looks like, lived out. 

The traditional school setting has forced us to be on a schedule. Which I love and String Bean loves and Jumping Bean loves and Bitty Bean loves, and Boy Bean, well, he hasn't voiced an opinion. We have specific chores to accomplish at specific times of day. Could that have happened when we were homeschooling? Yep. It even did at times. But there's something about knowing if you don't accomplish your job in a timely fashion, you will miss the bus - that is a motivator. A good one. 
The set routine is also forcing children who are not as inclined towards personal responsibility to learn good habits. I don't carry their backpacks. I don't put away their shoes. I don't check to be sure they have their homework. We have set routines in place - so they just have to remember the steps, and they will have everything they need. This is a very good thing. 

Our house is calmer, more efficient, more welcoming, and actually, more relaxed, since this change up.  

Each child is thriving with the space to develop away from their sibling's shadow.  
They enjoy time together more - because they have time apart.

I am thankful every single day for where we live. 
That String Bean can be in this district and Jumping Bean can attend her Christian school. 
The teachers at both schools have been superb. When I look to the future and see deployment, I am thankful to have them on my team. I'm thankful for their knowledge in education, and in life. 

Basically, here is my sum-up:
I do not think our decision is right (or wrong) for anybody else.  
Educating your children is a multi-faceted thing, and I seek to support my friends as they follow the best path for their family.
For us, this year, this is our best path. 

~Whitney 
 Copyright 2012

The Why's and What for's....

Well, change is happening. Or happened.

I'm NOT pregnant.

We had planned on homeschooling String Bean (2nd grade) and Jumping Bean (Kindergarten) this year.
Here is the why behind that decision:
It worked pretty well last year.
My Love is still on a sea tour and will be deploying early next year.
We wanted the flexibility of the homeschooling schedule so we could be with My Love whenever possible.

Really, that was the primary reason FOR homeschooling: Flexibility/time with Daddy.

But when we found out his schedule (And realized how very little we will see him over the next year) homeschooling didn't really seem to make sense for us.

I've never been a die-hard homeschooler.
I guess you could say I'm reluctant at best.  
And I was really, really, really nervous about starting up school knowing that a deployment was staring me in the face.

I was beyond nervous. I felt overwhelmed.

I knew that no matter what I did - one of the areas (at least!) I'm responsible for, would fail.

My Love knows me very well, and he trusts me to tend to the things of home when he is away. But when we learned his schedule - he became much more concerned about the weight of homeschooling on my shoulders.  Work-ups and deployments are HARD. They are hard on all members of the family and they are EXHAUSTING.

He wanted to alleviate some of that pressure.

I finally admitted to My Love that I was dreading starting school. 

I was terrified of the work load it would bring. 

And I didn't know if that terror was because I am lazy and just didn't' want to DO the work; 

OR if it was because I was adding work I wasn't supposed to bear. 

Sometimes, it is really hard to tell the difference.

The night before school officially started, the decision was made:
"Whitney, we're sending them to school."

I almost cried, I was so relieved.

God knew all along we would be here. He planned it out so beautifully.  
For them to go to school, they are required to have physicals and updated shots...back in June when I made their annual appointment, the first opening the Doctor had was on Tuesday, September 4th.
The First Day of School.
The day I was going all over the place enrolling them.
So, on THAT day - unknown to me 3 months ago - I went to: 2 schools and picked up paperwork; the Pediatricians office and had 2 physicals and 3 children caught up on shots (highly NOT recommended);  had String Bean do a reading assessment; dropped off paperwork; saw 2 classrooms; met 2 teachers; and did all the back to school shopping. (Thank you Target!)
Did I mention ALL 4 were with me the WHOLE time?! I was exhausted.

So now, String Bean is happily enrolled as a 2nd grader at the public school for our neighborhood; and Jumping Bean is attending Kindergarten at a small Christian preschool/Kindergarten down the street. They are both over-the-moon excited! AND  - they only missed 1 day. :)

We've been at this for one week now...and everyone is thriving.  This house is loaded with 3 over-the-top-off-the-charts extroverts - and all 6 of us are loving this change.

String Bean comes home almost giddy every day. (Even yesterday, when she got her finger stuck/pinched in a door and had to wait for someone to come by and set her free) She loves riding the bus. Her classmates are lovely. She loves the competition, the schedule, the workload.

Jumping Bean loves her teacher. She loves meeting new people and doing new things. She has the space to show her personality without being constrained by her siblings. She loves having her own place - her own things - her own friends.

Bitty Bean and I have been doing school together - and she loves the uninterrupted time she gets. I can focus on just her. When we dropped Jumping Bean off that first day, Bitty Bean buckled back into her seat and said, "Oh yeah. I'm the big boss lady now!"

Boy Bean is also developing through this. There are more quiet moments and time where he can talk for himself. He is learning to do things, because a sister won't do it for him. I am able to teach him (and Bitty Bean) things that had slid to the side...following through on cleaning up, obedience, speaking, cooking together, reading together, time to enjoy each other.

For the first time in forever, My Love came home to a clean home, a good meal, caught up laundry, happy children, and a happy wife.

I think that about sums it up. :)

~Whitney Copyright 2012

Watching my heart walk away....

Today is a momentous day.

I have the rare treat of getting my heart beat up, not one, but TWO separate times.  (Please note the sarcasm.)  It has been said that being a parent feels like watching your heart walk around outside your body...so does being a military spouse.  (More on that tomorrow)

This morning we were awakened 5 minutes before the alarm went off by an extremely excited 5 year old.  Our little String Bean was so excited about her first day of school she woke up...early...on her own....because she "didn't want to be late for school."  (!)  :)

String Bean and her backpack

After the morning routine of feeding, cleaning, and dressing the natives that keep me smiling and exhausted; all 5 of us piled into the "Big Car" and took String Bean to school.  (Hallelujah! Her school starts at 10!)  She was thrilled beyond words - not even a trace of nervousness.  I, however, was inwardly fretting myself to death.  After packing and re-packing her lunch....and worrying about if she had enough food....or too much....or if it was strange and would cause her to be made fun of.....I realized I AM THAT MOTHER.  

You know, the mom who can't let go of her baby?  The one who looks at her big 5 year old child walking into a classroom and wonders if she'll remember......fill in the blank?  You know the mom who has raised her child to be independent and capable - and is thrilled the child actually IS those things - but still has a bit of a sore heart as she watches the tiny baby that brought the gift of motherhood into her life step into the Great Big world? That mom?  Well, That Mom is Me.

I really did fine. No tears. No lump in my throat. Just smiles and pride that my little girl is growing up.

Until.

Jumping Bean all dressed up

Until we had been gone an hour (Having a WONDERFUL time with Jumping Bean and Chilly Bean), and Jumping Bean said "I think we can go get Canaan now."  

I felt the exact same way. 

After we picked String Bean up from school - 4 WHOLE HOURS later - we returned home and heard all about her amazing day.  She truly had the best time ever. EVER.

As My Love and I sat down with her, hearing all about every minute detail, we were thrilled to know it had gone so very well.  Then I reiterated to her what else was happening today.

My Love is deploying.  Until the end of the year.

We will get to take him to the airport late tonight, hug him, kiss him, and leave him.  He will not come home with us.  He will go and do his job.

String Bean sat very still, then she crawled into my lap, and sobbed.

When I asked her what she loves most about Daddy she said, "Everything."

I feel the exact same way.

Copyright 2010