A challenge undertaken.
A challenge to listen. To act. To step out.
So far, in my 8 days of the "10 second rule," I have had small promptings....talk to that person, write a note, make a call, answer the questions of the children, focus beyond myself.
The goal is to place yourself in the habit of obedience - in the habit of listening. And already I can see the difference it is making in my focus.
But in the interest of honesty - although I wanted my focus to be corrected and my obedience to the Lord better and my life to not be wasted; I really didn't want to change.
I didn't want big things asked of me...
because then I'd have to do them.
Change is painful.
It tastes yucky.
It makes you clumsy.
But I don't want to be a baby Christian without real faith forever.
So I'm taking this pain.
I'm taking the intense self-evaluation.
I'm facing fear.
Because really, that is what holds me back from faith, from trust, from growth.
Fear of the unknown.
Fear of not having control.
Fear of looking stupid.
Fear of what other people think.
Fear of harming my name.
Fear of harming God's name.
I could excuse it - rationalize it - brush it away as reason. But the truth is I am a woman who doesn't believe Isaiah 41:10
"DO NOT FEAR, FOR I AM WITH YOU; DO NOT ANXIOUSLY LOOK ABOUT YOU, FOR I AM YOUR GOD. I WILL STRENGTHEN YOU, SURELY I WILL HELP YOU. SURELY I WILL UPHOLD YOU WITH MY RIGHTEOUS RIGHT HAND." NAS
I am going to keep trusting, keep obeying, keep listening; and take baby steps away from fear...and closer to the God who created the universe, who parted the Red Sea, who breathed life into humanity - and is with me.
10 seconds....No Fear.